


How to Deal With a Booty Call From a Chaos God?

by Satans_Niece



Category: Mayonaka no Occult Komuin, Midnight Occult Civil Servants
Genre: Demons being bros, Forgive Me, Gay, I'm typing this over a cat, Kohaku is gay, M/M, arata is a BEAN, but not creepy bean guy he's blocked, gods being hoes, haven't decided yet, humanity is confused, so is arata probably, somebody get kyouichi a girlfriend, token straight
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-03
Updated: 2019-08-08
Packaged: 2020-02-16 20:58:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18699019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Satans_Niece/pseuds/Satans_Niece
Summary: Kohaku:"YAAAAAY SEIMEI!!"Arata: huh?In other words, Kohaku's here to stay and Arata's not sure WHAT that means for him or his nice quiet life solving supernatural relations crisis and living off of convenience store bentos.





	1. Think Way Too Hard

Arata guessed he shouldn’t be this personally bothered by something as weird as a stray god of calamity deciding to take up residence in his house, but he’d been thinking about some of the things Kohaku had said and it was interfering with his paperwork.

“ _Aw, you’re so cold, Seimei_ ” Kohaku had complained when Arata had pushed him off after the _kyoshi_ incident yesterday, acting more like a puppy than a demon. Since then, he hadn't been far from Arata's side, and Arata was having a hard time deciding wether or not to be annoyed with that.

Theo claimed that Anothers were like animals, or typhoons, beings without reason or motive, but the more Arata learned about his ancestor and the Anothers, the more he decided that the Anothers probably _did_ follow some logic, it just wasn’t based on anything comparable to the human idea of common sense.  

Of course, everything came back to Kohaku.

 _“I’m not interested in any name but the one you gave me._ ” The god had assured Arata before introducing himself by another name, and the civil servant wondered if the significance of an Another's name held the same weight as it did in fairytales.  Did the invocation or presence of what name an Another was currently living under have anything to do with who they were as a being?  Theories of greek and roman gods swam behind the gears turning in his head, but he also didn't want to assume anything about aztec Anothers just because it applied to another region's mythology.

In any case, The coyote/god/nuisance had gone across the continent and collected a lot of ingredients to set up a very specific plan just to try to make sure his old friend Seimei remembered him. It was almost like the greeting he’d gotten from Yuki, although getting fly-tackled by a nekomata caused far less headache and paperwork than an activated occult war machine and a god of calamity. He wondered if Koyoichi was serious when he'd said the japanese government would deport him if it found out he was being 'haunted' by the great and menacing Huehuecoytotl.

On the topic of haunting, this morning had raised more than a few questions in Arata’s mind as to how close Kohaku had been to his ancestor. Certainly personal space hadn’t been a factor, though Kohaku’s attempts to get into _his_ could simply be an attempt to push a boundary held by the original Seimei.

 _“You weren’t like this before”_ the god had pouted.  
Who had he been before? (Who had Seimei been before?) Had he even been human? His grandfather had mentioned Abe no Seimei being an onmoyoji, Kohaku’s and the tengu’s statements about how human he was acting had him wondering. Did he have the Ears of Sand because somewhere in his ancestry wasn’t a great _onmoyoji_ , but an Another?

For better or for worse Seo noticed him staring out into space and dumped another load of paperwork on his desk, probably the stack he was supposed to be doing, and skirted off to experiment in the back room with things he probably wasn’t supposed to be doing.


	2. Don't Encourage the Coyote

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kohaku is hungover from magic gorilla sake, Arata needs to go to work, and Yuki just wants tuna

The morning after the drinking contest with the shrine god Gogen, Arata drifted into consciousness feeling warmer than he’d been in a long time. Half asleep, he moved to throw the blanket off of his bed and became acutely aware that his arm had just ended up in the blanket’s face and the blanket was a not a blanket. Head still swimming with visions of drunk gorilla yokai, Arata’s brain took a minute to process that the weight snaking across his stomach was a long ponytail and the warmth at his neck was someone’s face pressed into it.

 _Ah shit_ , he thought, wondering the consequences of waking up a sleeping, probably-hung over god of calamity. Then his alarm rang and the consequences paled in comparison to being late to work.

“Kohaku, get off”, Arata protested, attempting to push the sleeping god off of him. He was pretty sure Kohaku was awake judging on the slight smirk, but he still wasn’t budging. Arata pushed himself up on one arm, trying desperately to free his right from Kohaku’s unsurprisingly strong death-grip. The commotion woke Yuki, who grew a foot and pounced on the alarm, stopping the noise.

“Arata, can I have more of that yummy tuna stuff Seo gave me?” the nekomata howled, smoothing one ear back with a white paw. The cat seemed to have no appreciation for Arata’s struggle, though Yuki also seemed to like smothering him.

Letting himself fall back down onto the bed, Arata decided to take a new approach to dislodging the stubborn coyote.

“If you don’t let me up I’m going to be late to work, and if I’m late I’ll have to work late too” Arata stated flatly, hoping that this static cling Kohaku seemed to have towards Seimei could work in his favor for once. Of course, he knew that Kohaku could just follow him to work anyways to watch, but it was worth a shot.

The god, giving up on pretending to be asleep, yawned.

“Why do you have to go to work, anyways? You could just stay here, and we could have fun”

Arata tried not to imagine what plans the coyote had in mind for “fun” after the past “game” he’d planned had begun with theft, hundreds of kyoshi, and bargaining for kidnapped school-girls from a Chinese demon.

“Just let me up so I can get to my shift on time?” Arata tried, eyeing the clock and mentally calculating how much time he had before he was absolutely late. The shrine god’s sake had been strong and the hangover was even stronger; he’d wanted to get coffee before going into work, but Kohaku was getting in the way of that idea.

Luckily he must have been feeling merciful, (or nostalgic for Seimei) because Kohaku let go of him and sat up as Arata stumbled out of bed and tried to smooth down his mussed hair. He tried not to pay attention to the golden eyes watching him as he got dressed, knowing he wouldn’t leave even if he did mind. Kohaku flopped dramatically back down on his bed.

"You've never left me for work before" he complained, while Arata pretended not to here and buttoned his shirt.

Yuki twined around his legs, begging for tuna, and the hung over civil servant mentally added it to the list of things to buy on the way to work. before tightening his tie and ducking out before Kohaku devised any more 'fun'.


	3. Realize You're Never Getting Rid of Him

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arata tries to explain private property. Kohaku isn't having it.

“Why did you follow me?” Arata asked Kohaku, sighing as he pushed through his front door. The god blinked, petting Yuki, who he’d somehow managed to scoop up, though the nekomata wasn’t usually partial to begin held.

“Follow you?” Golden eyes stared down at Arata, though he wasn’t falling for it.

“It wasn't exactly subtle when you hid behind that advertisement in city hall. You’re lucky Seo and Kyouichi were too busy inspecting the elevator to notice your ponytail” rebuked Arata.

“Why didn’t you tell me what we were dealing with? You knew, didn’t you?”  
Kohaku shrugged. “You had it under control. Besides, Pandora didn’t even know who you are. Western gods are so wrapped up in their domains they hardly notice those outside of their own territories.”

Arata made a mental note to ask him more about that later, vowing to start a case file detailing his experience with different Anothers to avoid the misunderstandings those without the ears of sand were prone to. Yuki squirmed in Kohaku’s arms, and he reluctantly let the cat down. Arata slipped off his shoes and bent down to pull on his slippers, dropping the convenience store bag at his feet.

“Foooooood!” Yuki exclaimed, running over and sniffing the bag. Arata had picked up cat food as well as tuna (because the cat wasn’t getting premium-grade fish at _every_ meal), as well as two pre-made bentos. He wasn’t sure if Kohaku needed to eat, but Yuki seemed to enjoy physical food, so he assumed Kohaku would too.

Dragging his feet, Arata plodded into the kitchen, taking a bento out of the bag and popping open a can of tuna for Yuki and putting it next to the table. Kohaku floated near the other side of the room, but saw the bento and drifted down to sit at the table across from Arata.

“I haven’t had food of this era yet.” he admitted, eyeing the bento.

Arata chuckled, “Well I wouldn’t get too excited, it’s just a convenience-store meal”  
Kohaku seemed to be content to eat in silence, which was appreciated by Arata, who’d had a long night trying to reason with a stubborn greek Another trying to court a traffic cone. He squinted at the sun coming in through the window across from the table and stabbed his chicken ruefully. He hadn’t known what he was in for when he’d agreed to the night shift, but rookies couldn’t be choosers.

Finally, he dumped his container in the wastebasket and forced himself upstairs to go to bed, trailed by Kohaku and Yuki. When the cat settled into his bed next to Arata’s, he had an idea.

“Do you want a bed?” he asked the Another, who’d already stretched out on his.

Kohaku rolled over with distaste. “Why do I need another one?”

Arata realized that this conversation was going much like the one he’d had earlier with Pandora.

“Because this one’s mine”, he tried patiently.

Kohaku looked at him funny. “Well then it’s mine too, right?”

Well that was new. Kohaku had never directly referenced his relationship with Seimei before, but Arata supposed that this was like anything else the coyote had told him: peripheral, seemingly unimportant, and to be taken with a grain of salt.

“It’s my bed, you just like to use it.”

"Well then what's the difference?" The god looked up at him with uncharacteristically guileless, golden eyes.

He was beginning to realize Kohaku probably didn’t have much concept of private property. Then again, the coyote was older than the feudal system, not to mention capitalist economics.

“Seimei never made me leave”

Arata sighed. He didn’t have energy for this. A god of calamity taking over his bedroom had not been in the job description. If Seo knew he’d probably make a joke about it being a ‘perk’ and make that face he used when insinuating things Arata didn’t particularly want insinuated. He sighed, and decided to deal with the situation tomorrow. He had a nice bedroom down the hall he could make up and possibly coax the coyote into using. It would give him his bed back, being that it was only a single to begin with. For know, he’d suck it up and deal with sharing a bed with a chaos deity.

Kohaku was definitely enjoying this way too much. Arata turned around to undress, and yuki kneaded his bed while gradually settling down to sleep. He had a little ball of dust next to him Arata assumed he’d fished out of some corner.

Getting into his own bed, Arata made sure to face away from the asshole coyote. Surprisingly, Kohaku left him alone, but he could feel the dip in the bed where the coyote was, curled slightly as to not bump into Arata.

He should have known that the sneaky coyote would wait till he was asleep.

When he woke up somewhere close to mid afternoon to find his blanket completely thrown off and the conked-out god wrapped around him like a child clinging to a teddy bear, Arata accepted his fate as a human sacrifice of the weirdest kind and decided to not contemplate the concept that he wasn’t entirely opposed to this occurrence becoming regular.

Kohaku was good at curling around him without getting any limbs stuck under Arata, though the long, snaking, purple ponytail draped across him was something to get used to. It was heavier than one would expect. Kohaku’s left arm fell across Arata’s stomach, and he was pretty sure the weight he felt pressed to his neck was the god’s forehead. He reached down to look at his watch, accidentally moving Kohaku’s arm, and saw that the time was 3:37pm.

Little over two hours until his alarm went off at 6pm to get ready for his 7pm shift to begin. Kohaku stirred in his sleep and pressed himself closer to Arata, murmuring something that sounded like “don’t leave” before the shorter man felt the unmistakable feeling of lips pressed to his spine. He went still as he waited to see how awake Kohaku was.

But then the coyote sagged again and after a minute, started snoring, leaving a now wide-awake Arata whole two hours to overthink what had just happened.


	4. Make Sure Your Favorite Idiot Remembers You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kohaku needs his Seimei back.  
> Arata is debating why the hell he signed up for this job.

The house was empty without Arata. As Kohaku padded around the empty rooms, he marveled at how similar and also how different it was from where he’d found Seimei so many millennia ago.

He’d been surprised a week ago when he’d heard the wind sprites whisper the name “Seimei”. He’d been in his homeland for the first time in a long time, drifting across the continents and through the decades, without a geographical or chronological anchor. He’d been painting the leaves the red of autumn in a tiny town in current day mexico when he’d heard the murmurs. Seimei was back. Now a  human possessing the Ears of Sand. The great Abe no Seimei had returned after so many years, with no memory of who he was or what had happened to him. Kohaku should have figured it would be up to him to sort this out.

He checked his sources and was off for Japan, picking up the attention and services of a nine-headed pheonix along the way. Seimei couldn’t have forgotten. Seimei would never forget him. Not after everything.

On the way, he concocted a plan. He’d set off a toy he’d been wanting to try out for a while, and Seimei would show up and chastise him for playing with the humans as they ran this way and that, willy-nilly like no other race did. Seimei would fix the whole thing with a snap of his fingers, saving all of their insignificant little lives. He would cuff Kohaku over the head and take him home, and he’d have a home again.

Things didn’t go according to plan.

He set the device off and waited, leaving the door open for Seimei as the kyoshi milled about. Five minutes, fifteen minutes, finally Seimei came, appearing through the seal.

But something wasn’t right. He couldn’t put his finger on it, but the man looking at him with fear and confusion was Seimei. This human was Seimei in his speech and his hair and the way his eyes widened slightly when he was thinking ; but the fear in his eyes wasn’t Seimei at all. The way he looked at Kohaku and didn’t see him, didn’t recognize him. There was no time behind those eyes, no memories. Still, he persisted. Seimei would remember him, he had to.

“Seimei? What are you mad about, Seimei?” Kohaku goaded, feeling like he was trying to re-teach a toddler his own name.

“I told you, I’m not this damn Seimei!” Seimei yelled in a tone Kohaku knew too well. This game was getting long. Maybe if he could knock his forgetful self out for a few hours and poke around his mind to see what was wrong… he could at least have a little fun with the friends Seimei brought here with him.

“You’re not? You’re not Seimei? Really? I see. I thought you were. If that’s not the case, oh well..I’ll just kill you, then. I prepared all this for my friend, but it’s gone to waste. I don’t like the fact that you resemble Seimei. Die.”

But then he’d objected, finally admitted that he was Seimei, and

Kohaku had decided on a whim to try and give him one more chance to figure it out. It was kind of funny to see him frustrated like this though. Maybe he could shock him into remembering. Maybe the alter would do the trick.

Stupid, stubborn Seimei. So clever kohaku couldn’t shock him into anything, not for lack of trying. He’d finally seemed remember Kohaku’s name, but his eyes were still lost, wandering along the path of someone else’s words, not one of his own memories. It would have to be enough for now.

He would figure out how to bring Seimei’s memories back.

And then Seimei had mirrored almost exactly something that had happened long ago, and Kohaku almost choked at the memory.  
“My name is Miyako Arata!” the man looking up at him with fire in his eyes yelled, just as he had years before.  
_“I am Abe no Seimei.”_

“Don’t call me Seimei!”

The challenge rang out in the wind, echoing in Kohaku's ears " _Be sure to call me that!”_

  
Maybe he hadn't completely lost Seimei after all.


	5. Figure Out How To Whoop His Ass

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kohaku's in the doghouse. Arata might build one for him if he keeps acting like such a little bitch.  
> ___SPOILERS FOR EPISODE FIVE___  
> I mean really?? How jealous does the guy have to get of a childhood friend to have her removed from the picture by a devil collecting and stealing the attributes of young women  
> who knows, really, it's just time for the coyote to learn some manners.

Kyouichi’s sister was kidnapped by a dark man who drenched the world in black sand, Izumi was gone too, and Kohaku knew something about the bastard who did it. So why the fresh hell did the damned coyote show up so smug. Arata’d known he was hanging around, but he hadn’t expected him to show up _that_ quickly after Arata called him.

“I like that look on your face, I never really got to see it before” the god crooned, smiling.

“Bastard”

“Wait. Think about it— I’m not the one you should be mad at. It’s that devil who’s collecting all the human females. The ones I used in the kyoshi rituals, and now her too”

“Then tell me! Where is Izumi!”

“A place you cannot reach”

“Can’t reach… _Where?!_ ”

_“Hell”_

What Kohaku didn’t realize was that he’d just dug his own grave. That smug little smile at Arata’s distress might’ve said one thing, but the way he’d reasoned away his involvement with the whole thing, kohaku knew he’d done something bad. He wouldn’t have felt the need to justify himself to Arata if he thought he hadn’t hadn’t. ‘Anothers can’t be reasoned with’ was a good excuse for the actions of those who couldn’t understand them, but it wasn’t good enough for Arata. Kohaku was smart enough to know  _exactly_ what he did.

 _“Hell?!”_ Arata wondered in awe before getting an idea.

“Kohaku, you’re coming to the station with me. Kyouichi wanted to talk to you.”

He hoped that the god’s general clingy tendencies were still intact, it might help him figure this out if he could just keep the damn coyote in one place, not causing trouble for the time being. Luckily Kohaku seemed to be placated for the moment and he floated down and draped himself over Arata, which was weird enough of a habit when stationary, but when he walked the god remained weightless, long body trailing lackadaisically behind him like a humanoid, overgrown, ridiculously annoying cape.

“So first you tell me that I can’t come with you to work and now you’re bringing me yourself?” Kohaku mused, face a bit too close to Arata’s ear for comfort.

“This isn’t an open invitation,” Arata growled, “Kyouichi just has some questions for you and I need to be there to interpret.”

Kohaku gave a vague noise of acknowledgement, clasping his hands over Arata’s chest, somehow reveling in the man’s barely-contained anger. Arata had to fight the urge to throw him off and punch him, but he needed the information the coyote seemed to have to get Izumi and Kyouichi’s sister back more than the satisfaction of breaking Kohaku’s perfect nose.

“Did you have anything to do with Izumi and Kyouichi’s sister being taken?”

Kohaku sneered, laughing, “So you care more about the lives of humans when they’re ones close to you? What about all of the other girls that demon has taken over the decades he’s been reconstructing Her? Don’t you want to save them too?”

“Y-yes of course!” Arata sputtered, “I just want to get Izumi back as well, and Kyouichi’s been missing his sister for 17 years!”  
Kohaku laughed again, and it made Arata want to strangle him for trying to take the moral high ground after being complicit in the kidnapping himself.

“Humans are so very funny. They can kill thousands of each other in their wars and it’s just numbers, but as soon as someone has a name and a face; connections, a family, their death is a tragedy they can’t recover from.” He paused and circled around so he was facing Arata, his nose inches from Arata’s, “What about me?” he asked Arata, his golden eyes liquid in the streetlight, “Someone I care about disappeared over a thousand years ago, and when I finally got him back, he didn’t even remember me.”

Arata finally snapped and shoved him off, “I can’t control my own memories, and for all I know you could be pretending that i’m this Seimei person so you can mess with my head and sleep in my bed while I’m none the wiser because I don’t have memories to prove it is or isn't so. Also, you don’t get to lecture me on morality after you participated in your own so-called tragedy by allowing him to keep doing this after you saw what was happening, which let Izumi get hurt! Hell, I'm starting to think you volunteered her  yourself after how you act when she comes over”

  
Kohaku seemed genuinely speechless at that, but Arata didn’t have the patience to care about the coyote's precious feelings at the moment.

“Now come on, you need to come with me to answer Kyouichi’s questions.” he said brusquely.

Kohaku trailed him like a kicked puppy for about a block before wrapping his arms around Arata’s middle and burying his face in his shoulder. Arata vaguely wondered about the god’s upbringing while his mind still raced to all the possibilities that Kohaku could have meant about Izumi and Kyouichi’s sister being in hell, and what that meant about the identity of that creep who kidnapped them.

In any case, when they got home, or possibly just right in front of his colleagues, though Arata didn’t want to freak them out by arguing with the Chaos God, Kohaku had some pretty serious explaining to do. Arata thought about punching him, but the god had already proven himself far above Arata’s (somewhat limited) combat training and would probably just laugh at him, so it would be more effective to verbally dress him down and banish him to the storage unit that Yuki had guarded for so long.

He couldn’t actually force the god to stay there, but his words seemed to have some influence on him, and that combined with Kyouichi’s questioning might be enough to get him to feel bad for what he’d done at least.

Now that he’d figured that out, all that was left was to interrogate a chaos god, rally his coworkers, and storm the gates of hell to get those girls back. A short list of high demands, even for one with the Ears of Sand descended from Abe no Seimei. Luckily he was going to force the chaos god to help whether the little bastard wanted to or not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> edit suggestions are greatly appreciated, i'm not good at proofreading :D  
> Thank you so much for the comments and kudos!!! it's people like you who keep me writing.  
> .  
> .  
> .  
> I also accept suggestions midweek about what the next chapter should be about~ I usually write each one after watching the anime as it comes out but I always need ideas.


	6. Figure Out What To Do When He's Gone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kohaku leaves for the festival of the gods, and Arata does paperwork.

The week that Yuki, Kohaku, and the rest of the Anothers were gone at their festival proved relatively uneventful for Arata. Unfortunately, Seiji and Kyoichi saw it as an excellent opportunity for the whole office to catch up on all of the paperwork that had accumulated since the _kyoshi_ incident. Which left Arata buried under a massive stack armed only with a pen, the government database, and a pre-packaged bento from a local convenience store. As a side project, Seo had wanted him to update the database with all of the things he’d learned about Anothers with his Ears of Sand.

So, assumedly safe from the whims of Kohaku and other random chaotic happenings, he settled into his project of updating the database and resolved to start on the mountain of paperwork… tomorrow. He had some interesting information on house gods, _tengu_ , and the drinking habits of gorilla yokai and shrine gods to input.

Finally, after several dull hours of paperwork, (he’d finished the data inputting fairly quickly and was now on page 42 of 407 of the forms detailing the delays to the olympic stadium construction project.) it occurred to him that if Abe no Seimei _was_ actually an Another, it might be worthwhile to search him up in the database. 

The cursor blinked at him and Arata had the strangest feeling that this was definitely not something he wanted to be caught doing. He looked over at Kyoichi, thoroughly engrossed in his paperwork, and Seo, leaning back in his chair, asleep, and decided that it was probably safe. Seiji had given him his login since Arata himself wasn’t in the system yet, so if anyone checked the account access history, they’d get his boss, not him. No one would question that, right? If anothers are claiming your kouhai is the descendant of an onmoyoji with mystical powers you’re allowed to look it up, right? 

Arata swallowed and typed in the name of his ancestor with an odd sort of anticipation for what he might find. Immediately, a search result popped up, so he clicked it and scanned the page. Pretty standard, birth date, death date, role in the court… _Status: [Inactive]_ …that’s a bit odd, if they had his death date… “Suspected half-Another, legendary son of Kuzunoha, a powerful kitsune and given the power to communicate with beasts” _[ see: Ears Of Sand]. _

Arata scanned through his life history for mention of Kohaku, but the only thing detailed was that he was ridiculously healthy, lived ridiculously long, could apparently command weak oni to do his bidding, and divine locations with limited clairvoyance. Then a recent addition… “List of Possible Descendants” and a link to his case file, which the computer wouldn’t let him access without a password.

Arata went back to the top of the entry and reread it to see if anything else stood out, but nothing seemed to say for sure if Seimei was an Another, just theories and odd coincidences. Certainly no mention of chaos gods, although he was known to keep odd hours and entertain strange guests. 

Finding nothing more, he carefully closed the tab and went back to his paperwork. Going home he tried not to let it bother him that the house would be empty, or stare at Yuki’s empty bed as he tried to go to sleep.

Under annoyance over the paperwork and whatever trouble he was sure Kohaku was causing, the page on Abe no Seimei wouldn’t get out of his head, but mostly that odd part under his ancestor’s death date.

Abe no Seimei.

Born: 921.

Died: 1005.

_Status: [Inactive]._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is so lateeee, things have been CRAZY. Next chapter: Kohaku comes back and he has Plans. Arata doesn't like Plans, but luckily Kohaku's done taking no for an answer.


End file.
